


Ready, Aim, Fire

by toad_in_the_road



Category: Iron Man (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe, Spider-Man - All Media Types, Spider-Man: Homecoming (2017), The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Avengers: Endgame (Movie) Spoilers, Character Turned Into a Ghost, Depression, Gen, Grief, Hallucinations, Hurt Peter Parker, I think y'all know who, Mental Health Issues, Post-Avengers: Endgame (Movie), Sad Peter Parker, Trigger Warnings, im gay, plz take caution
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-04-30
Updated: 2019-05-23
Packaged: 2020-02-10 12:39:51
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 13
Words: 7,863
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18660628
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/toad_in_the_road/pseuds/toad_in_the_road
Summary: STOP STOP STOP STOP STOP IF YOU HAVEN'T SEEN ENDGAMESPOILERS****After the final battle, the world adjusts, full of joy and relieved.So why is Peter seeing ghosts?





	1. With Our Backs To The Wall

There were very few times that Peter was glad that Aunt May gone home hours after him, but today was one of those rare days. 

He burst through the door like he was being pursued, glancing around quickly, although he logically knew no one was there. And if there was, he could easily stop it.

Still…

Peter dug the recent chemistry test out of his bag, glancing it over to make sure he had read it right. 

43/100. A failing grade. The third in a row.

This one would have to be hidden. 

Peter dug through the cabinets frantically. There had to be something that he could use to burn the paper. Matches, a lighter...something...bingo.

Peter managed to dig up a million year old lighter, the long kind used for lighting grills. He had no idea how why they had that. But it didn’t really matter.

Peter threw open the window to his room, lighting the paper on fire. The pencil marks and red ink turned red, and then black, curling in on itself like a dying flower. He dropped the paper, watching the embers and ash float away, and then disappear.

Gone.

“Look familiar, kid?” Peter turned to the source of the voice, a man in an expensive three piece suit and sunglasses that were worth more money than the entire state of Nebraska. The man had a neatly kept, short beard, and he was leaning lazily against the doorway. The man gave a sideways, cheeky smirk.

Tony Stark.

Peter glared. “Go away.” He shut his window, moving around Tony to put away the lighter.

Tony tsked quietly. “I was just wondering. That ash does look familiar, right? That’s not just me?”

“I don’t wanna talk about it.” Peter glared, slamming the drawer shut with faked finality. “Leave me alone. I don’t want you here.”

Tony took off his sunglasses, raising his eyebrows. “Is that any way to talk to your mentor?”

It wasn’t, and against logic Peter felt a stab of guilt. No, he normally didn’t talk to Tony Stark, aka freaking Iron Man, but this wasn’t normal circumstances.

It mostly wasn’t normal because Tony Stark had been dead for three weeks.

“I can talk to you however I want. You’re dead.” Peter tried and failed to keep the quiver out of his voice. “You aren’t real. This is just some weird, grief induced hallucination.” Peter walked past Tony, determined to ignore him.

As usual, it didn’t work.

“You seem pretty sure about that. Are you an expert on ghosts or something? Just because you died?” Tony ignored Peter’s wince, sitting on the side of his desk. “You didn’t come back as a ghost. You just didn’t know how.”

“Go away. You’re not real. I don’t want you here.” Peter said, pulling out a textbook. Study study...Tony was generally quiet if he studied. Generally.

“So what if I’m not?” Tony replied, putting on the sunglasses again. “You’re talking to me. And you won’t stop, even when you say you will. Because you’re weak. You can’t let go. Maybe I’m real. Maybe I’m not. But it doesn’t make a difference.”

Peter clenched his teeth, focusing. The laws of thermodynamics had never been more interesting. 

And then Tony dropped the Big One. He had said it a million times, but it never failed to punch Peter in the gut. 

“It’s your fault I died, you know.” 

Peter slammed the book closed, throwing it at Tony. He easily dodged, smirk growing wider.

“Shut up!” He yelled, not caring if the neighbors heard. 

“It’s true. If you had been faster going to the van, I’d still be here.” Tony shrugged. “There’s more too. You could have put on the gauntlet. You’re enhanced. You could have been faster pulling off the gauntlet in the first place on Titan. There’s, like, a million things. I could fill a book-oh wait. Can’t. I’m dead.”

“God, why can’t you just shut up?!” Peter yelled, starting towards the door.

“Where the hell do you think you’re going?! Outwalking guilt? That’s a new one. Well, you know what they say, take a long walk off a short pier-”

“SHUT UP!” Peter screamed into the apartment. He heard someone jump, and turned to see the neighbor down the hall staring at him like he had three heads. Peter turned tomato red, casting one last glance into the apartment before running off.

Stark wasn’t there anymore.


	2. The Darkness Will Fall

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 22 kudos?! sis thank you

_The first time Peter saw a ghost was at the funeral._

_It was deathly silent, and even the birds seemed to have stopped singing, watching the little procession of Pepper and Morgan walk to the edge of the lake, letting a little wreath of flowers carrying an arc reactor with the words “PROOF THAT TONY STARK HAS A HEART”._

_Peter still didn’t understand why anyone ever needed proof._

_Pepper looked seconds away from tears, holding Morgan’s hand tightly. Peter’s heart clenched, feeling a painful burn in the back of his throat. He would have given anything to have had Mister Stark introduce him to his daughter. He would have played dress up with her, lavished her with gifts, and drive her dad insane. Though something told him Morgan would rather tinker than play princess._

_When he cried this to Aunt May, she told him he could still do it._

_That was true. But it wasn’t the same._

_They both knew it._

_Peter glanced up, trying to blink away tears, but snapped his head back so quickly he got whiplash._

_There was Tony Stark, leaning against a tree, wearing his work clothes; jeans stained with oil, a faded AC/DC t-shirt, and tennis shoes. His hands were stained, as if he had already been working for a while before and had just popped out to see what the fuss was about._

_Tony caught Peter staring at him, and gave a lazy smile and waved at him. Peter tried to call out, but the tears made it choked, and instead of screaming “MISTER STARK!” it came out as “Agh m’st st-k.”_

_May glanced at him. “You okay, honey?”_

_Peter couldn’t believe she was asking that. He was better than okay, better than ever, Mister Stark was alive, Iron Man was still here, everything could go back to normal…_

_But when she followed his gaze, her eyes saw nothing._

_Peter looked pleadingly at Mister Stark, begging for a sharp quip, or a grand entrance. Instead, the man just shrugged and laughed._

_Amused at Peter’s dilemma._

_“...n-nothing. I’m okay. A wasp just buzzed by and it startled me.” Peter lied, never taking his eyes off of Mister Stark._

_When he looked out the window during the wake, the man was gone._


	3. We Never Quite Thought We Would Lose It All

Being Spider-man absolutely sucks now, too.

Peter perched on the top of a building, pretending to study and watch for criminal activity at the same time, when he was really just staring off into space.

“Well? Anything?” Tony asked, standing over Peter. Tony would often change outfits between visits, and now he was wearing the worst. The suit from the day he died. A sickening burn was creeping up the man’s arm, and the six stones shined brightly in his gauntlet. 

Peter hated those stones so much.

“No.” Peter muttered, unable to find the energy to tell Tony to beat it. 

“Hm. Almost like Spider-man isn’t needed. What a concept.” Tony grinned, walking to the other side of the building and looking over the side. Peter’s head jerked up, hearing someone shriek. A woman right below him was struggling, trying to yank her purse away from a masked man. 

“Hey!” Peter immediately swung down, grinning behind his mask. Useless who? “Stealing is illegal, jerk!” He snatched the purse up, leaping up and sticking to the side of the building. Before the guy could react, Peter webbed up his left hand. “There. That’ll teach you too-shit.”

His spidey-sense suddenly exploded, and Peter barely dodged a bullet as the man pulled a handgun out with his right hand and started shooting. “Get out of here!” Peter yelled, but the woman was already booking it out of there. 

_Stupid stupid stupid. Why didn’t you web up both his hands?_

Something whizzed by Peter’s left ear with an ear splitting bang, and he fell, hands clapped over his ears. Everything was ringing, and the thief was saying something, but it sounded like he was deep underwater. The thief kicked Peter in the ribs, snatching the purse and running.

Peter gasped. At least the man didn’t shoot him.

“He should have.” Tony said, leaning against the brick wall, glancing at the bullet hole in the stone. Somehow, Peter could hear him perfectly clearly. 

“He...he got the purse...I gotta stop him…” Peter muttered thickly, forcing himself to his feet. His ribs stung, but it was okay. Just a bruise. His ears on the other hand…

Peter stumbled behind a trash can, ripping off his mask and feeling his left ear, wincing when he felt something warm and wet. He pulled his hand away to confirm his worst fear. His ear was bleeding.

Tony scoffed. “Yeah, second time’s the charm with that ear. You didn’t get his right hand.”

“I-I know...I just forgot-” Peter muttered, freezing when Tony snapped his head to him.

“‘Forgot’? That’s cute kid. Forgetting is when you don’t study, when you don’t get the popcorn out of the microwave. Forgetting is not nearly causing a civilian death.” Tony took big strides towards Peter, and the latter scrambled, pressing himself against the wall. Tony glared furiously, kneeling down, inches from Peter’s face.

“You’re damn lucky she’s smarter than you. Otherwise there’d be a lot more red on your suit right now than you’d like.” Tony said in a low voice.

Peter grabbed his head, putting it between his knees and covering his ears. “Stop.”

Tony laugh, a bitterness behind it that Peter hated. “Stop? Why? Don’t like the truth? Sorry, Pete, not liking it isn’t gonna make it go away.”

“I’ll do better! No one is gonna die!” He cried, snapping his head back up to stare at Tony.

“No, you won’t.” Tony said, standing up, backing away from Peter. Somehow, this made Peter more nervous. “You’re not a hero. You’re just a kid. A stupid kid who thinks he’s an Avenger. A kid who made Pepper a widow, and Morgan grow up without a dad. You know what that’s like, kid. Why did you inflict it on someone else?” 

Peter immediately curled up again, clutching his head so tight it hurt. “Stop it, stop it, stop it, stop it…”

“Get up.” Tony snapped, walking out of the alley, leaving Peter. “You’re sitting in trash, and you smell like shit.”


	4. Ready Aim Fire. Ready Aim Fire

_“Mister Stark, Mister Stark, this is an emergency!”_

_“Woah woah, slow down. What kind of emergency? An I’ve-been-shot-and-I’m-bleeding-out-emergency?”_

_“N-no…”_

_“Then this isn’t my problem-”_

_“WAIT!” Peter shrieked into the phone, desperate for help. He was pacing back and forth on the side of an abandoned railcar, walking in spirals, his feet sticking. Adrenaline ran through him._

_There was silence, and for a horrible second Peter thought Mister Stark had hung up._

_“...alright. What is it kid?”_

_“Aunt May.” Peter gasped. He could barely breathe. He couldn’t think. It was like he was under the building again, and each breathe was smaller and smaller…_

_“Aunt May? Is she hurt?” Mister Stark asked._

_“She found out. She saw me in my suit.” Peter gasped, unable to hold back a sob. Oh God, oh God…_

_“What? How? What did she do? Where are you?” Mister Stark sounded frantic. “Hang on, I’m going to pick you up.”_

_“What?! No!”_

_“Sorry, Pete. It wasn’t an offer. Where are you?”_

_Peter gulped, trying to stop shaking. The only thing that would make this day worse was Mister Stark seeing him, Spider-man, having a mental breakdown hours after being offered to join the Avengers._

_“I-I’m in the old train stop in East Queens. In one of the train cars…” He said, looking around._

_“Mhm. I’ll be there in one.”_

_Peter gulped again, hanging up quickly, trying to breathe. Come on, come on…_

_“Hey kid.”_

_Peter jumped, wiping his eyes when he saw Mister Stark in a suit, hovering outside the train car. “Mister Stark!”_

_“So what exactly did your aunt say?” Mister Stark almost sounded amused._

_Peter took a shaky breath. “S-she just saw me, she screamed ‘what the fuck’, and I just...ran.”_

_“Watch your mouth, kid.”_

_Peter felt tears popping up again. “I can’t just sit! She’s probably furious! She wants to disown me or something, I’ll become one of those guys on the side of a street with a shopping cart and beard that everyone avoids-”_

_“That’s a bit of a jump.” Mister Stark said. He landed, and his helmet popped off. “Look, kid, your aunt loves you like crazy. I don’t think she’ll kick you out. If she does, we’re gonna have to have a talk.”_

_“But I lied to her, Mister Stark! She’s gonna know it was me who does all those dangerous things, and she’s not gonna let me be Spider-man anymore-”_

_“Ah ah!” Mister Stark shook his head, cutting Peter off. “That’s bullshit.” He paused. “Pretend I said bullcrap. Listen, it doesn’t matter if your aunt won’t let you go out. It doesn’t matter if she’s furious. It doesn’t matter if she kicks you out, which,” He added, seeing Peter’s face. “Will not happen. You’re Spider-man. No one can take that away from you. Okay?”_

_Peter sniffed, feeling embarrassed but better at the same time. “O-okay.”_

_“Now let’s get you back home before your aunt kicks my ass too hard for giving you all this high tech shit.”_

_“First of all Mister Stark, you’re swearing which means you’re a hypocrite. Second, you’re Iron Man. She can’t kick your ass.”_

_Mister Stark just shook his head solemnly. “Your optimism is unending and very misguided.”_


	5. An Empire Falls In Just One Day

Peter could consider himself lucky. There weren’t any visible wounds. 

His bruised ribs were covered by a shirt, and he easily cleaned up the blood around his ear. To his immense relief, he could still hear, and the ringing was starting to subside. 

“Pete?” 

Peter jumped, peeking out of his room. “Aunt May? You’re home early.” She looked exhausted, carrying two big plastic bags. She smiled at him nevertheless.

“I got off. I got Thai food for dinner. I’m sick of pizza.” She said, dropping the food on the table. 

Peter gasped, horrified, and shushed her. “You can’t say that! The New York Pizza Police will take you out!”

“Is this 1984 or something?” 

“Yeah. Big Brother is watching.”

She laughed. “We better hurry and eat this before the Pizza Police get us.”

They ate in calm silence, sometimes with May asking Peter how his day was, and other small talk. Peter hadn’t had Thai food in a while, and he had to admit it was a nice change.

“So how did the chemistry test go?”

Peter choked on satay, quickly guzzling water to put off the answer as long as possible. The glass was only so big, though.

“I-I dunno. We haven’t gotten them back yet.” He said, staring at his food.

“Oh? Doesn’t your teacher usually grade within a week?” May asked. Peter just shrugged. 

There was an uncomfortable silence. 

“...I thought we agreed no more secrets.” May said quietly. Peter grimaced, glancing up, seeing Tony standing behind May, watching the drama with piqued interest. 

“I know Aunt May. I’m not keeping secrets-” Peter started, but May cut him off.

“The school called me today.”

Peter felt his stomach drop and his face grew hot. _Shit._

“They told me you’ve been skipping. And that you’re failing chemistry, English, and Spanish, and you’re passing by the skin of your teeth in the other classes.”

_Shit shit shit._

Peter focused on his food, determined not to look at Tony or May.

“When we talked about Spider-man, we agreed it wouldn’t get in the way of school.” May said sternly.

“I know! I’m not skipping to be Spider-man!” Peter snapped. Oh boy. May’s eyes narrowed and Tony whistled. 

“Wish I had popcorn. This ought to be good.” Tony said. Peter wanted to throw something at him. 

“Then what are you doing?” May asked.

“Stuff! I dunno! Wandering around? I’m not trying to fail, May!” Peter said, growing desperate. 

May sighed, rubbing the bridge of her nose. “Peter, I know this is hard. I know, honest. But you can’t just close yourself off. Don’t you want to pass high school? There’s so much opportunity for you out there, don’t throw it away-”

“I’m NOT throwing it away!”

“Where’s your last chemistry test?” May asked, voice hard. 

“Ooh, the plot thickens.” Tony said. 

“I...I told you. I haven’t gotten it back.” Peter stuttered, face flushing again.

“Peter. Don’t lie to me.”

Peter gulped, stomach turning uncomfortably. “I...I burned it.”

“You WHAT?!” 

Peter winced. Apparently that was it. 

“What the hell are you thinking, Peter?! You’re flunking junior year, the most important year of high school! You’re closed off and lying! I barely see you anymore! Tony wouldn’t have wanted-”

Peter saw red, and he heard a loud crash and May yelped. He had flipped the table, glass shards sparkling on the floor like deceptive stars, food stains swirling together to make a mosaic of red, brown, and yellow. 

“TONY STARK WOULD HAVE WANTED TO BE ALIVE, MAY! BUT HE’S NOT! YOU DON’T KNOW ANYTHING! JUST LEAVE ME THE FUCK ALONE!”

Peter rushed to his room, slamming the door so hard the wood cracked. 

Dead silence. 

“You certainly handled that well.” Tony said, sitting on Peter’s bed. 

At that, Peter slid down against the wall, silent sobs echoing in his ringing ears.


	6. You Close Your Eyes and the Glory Fades

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Marvel: *mentions once that Peter was in marching band*  
> Me, holding a gun to a Russo brother's head and crying: what instrument did he play I swear to God

_“So how’d you defeat this Vulture guy anyway?” Mister Stark asked, tinkering with the eyes on Peter’s mask. The eyes kept shifting whenever he moved to fast, making it hard to see and giving Peter a headache._

_“Hm?” Peter said. He hadn’t really been listening. He was walking on the ceiling, playing darts with Ned on Game Pigeon._

_“Vulture. That Adrian Toomes guy. What’d you do?” Mister Stark asked again, looking up. “Get down. If you fall and break something you’re paying for it.”_

_“Mister Stark, I don’t even know what half the stuff in this room is.”_

_“Then I’ll just make you feel really guilty about it.”_

_Peter sighed, swinging down. “I chased him to an old warehouse, it blew up, then I chased him to a plane-”_

_“Wait wait, timeout.” Mister Stark turned, holding up a tiny screwdriver. “The warehouse blew up?”_

_Peter shrugged, uncomfortable. “Kinda...I mean, it collapsed, I don’t know exactly what it did, but-”_

_“It collapsed?! Did it collapse on you?!”_

_Peter wriggled, wishing he was on the ceiling again. “I...I really would rather not talk about Mister Stark.”_

_“Tough. Sit your arachnid ass down right now.” Mister Stark pointed to a stool. Peter trudged over, dragging it back over._

_“A building. Collapsed on you?!”_

_“Yeah….”_

_“And you didn’t tell me.”_

_Peter fidgeted._

_“Care to explain your thought process on that?” Mister Stark asked._

_“W-well, I mean, it already happened, it’s not like I could undo it, and it kinda just...slipped my mind…”_

_“It slipped your mind?! Kid, why didn’t you call me?! I could’ve helped! I-” Mister Stark froze. “Oh my God...I took the suit.”_

_“I-it’s okay! I got out! I’m okay! See?!” Peter wriggled, as if that would prove how unscathed he was._

_“Was that why you didn’t go into that condemned building? The one where they thought a worker was trapped?”_

_Peter instantly turned beet red. That was still a sore spot. He was going to go into a building that was collapsing and get the trapped worker out, but...he just froze. He couldn’t make himself go in. Luckily, first responders got the guy out, and no one was seriously hurt. But still…_

_“How did you even know about that?” Peter asked. He was fairly certain it wasn’t big news._

_“Baby Monitor protocol.” Mister Stark said._

_Peter’s head jerked up. “That’s still there?!”_

_“Kid, I’ll take that off when I die.”_

_Peter sighed, looking down again. “I...just got nervous...what if someone got hurt?!”_

_“No one did.”_

_“But someone could in the future!” Peter cried. He jerked slightly when he felt Mister Stark grab his shoulders gently._

_“Kid. I’m sorry I took the suit. I didn’t realize...that was going to happen. Next time you get scared like that? Call me. I want to help you. I don’t want you to be scared. Okay?”_

_Peter gulped, and slowly nodded. “O-okay Mister Stark.”_

_Mister Stark nodded, turning back to his work._

_“So, when are you gonna take the Baby Monitor off?”_

_“I believe I already answered that question.”_


	7. Ready Aim Fire

“Hey, dude, you there?” Ned nudged Peter, who jolted in his seat, and his textbook clattered to the ground. The teacher glared at him, and Peter mumbled a quick apology.

“Just tired.” Peter said, sitting back up. They were in the gym, waiting for an assembly starring some sort of important scientist Peter had never heard of.

“You’ve been tired for a while. We haven’t hung out in like, forever.” Ned persisted.

“I’ve just been busy, okay? A lot of stuff going on.”

“Like...Spider-man stuff?”

Peter sighed. “Whisper a little louder, I don’t think everyone heard.”

Ned huffed. “Hey, I mean, when was the last time we watched Star Wars?”

“We’ve seen Star Wars a million times, I think we’ll survive.”

Ned looked horrified. “Okay, now I really know something is wrong.”

Peter felt a prickle of irritation. But he would not snap at Ned. May and him were still giving each other the silent treatment, Peter couldn’t take it if Ned and him stopped talking too…

“I’m...I’m just really tired, okay? Really. I’m fine.” Peter said, forcing his voice to stay neutral.

Ned didn’t seem convinced, but let the matter more or less drop. “Are you patrolling tonight?”

Peter shrugged. “I dunno. Probably.”

“I’m still your guy in the chair, right?”

Peter smiled in spite of himself. “Yeah, totally. I’ll call you if I go out, okay?”

Ned smiled back, looking relieved. 

“Awesome.”

“Alright, everyone. Please quiet down.” The principal stood over the podium, scanning over a sea of high schoolers. It was like looking at tangible regrets. “I want you all to give your attention to Dr. Farley Stillwell from New York University.”

Peter clapped along with the rest of the school lifelessly. Maybe he could take a nap. 

“Hello, everyone. I’m Dr. Stillwell…”

And Peter had already passed out. 

*** *** ****

“You know as well as me, Toomes. That kid is the reason you’re here. Now I have a way out, and all I’m asking is for a name.” Mac Gargan said in a low voice. 

“I don’t know.” Adrian Toomes said stubbornly. He wouldn’t give up the name. It was the least he could do…

“Bullshit! Come on, after everything, you still wanna protect that rat?” Gargan growled, banging his hand on the table. The prison guard gave them a warning look, and Gargan looked down. He traced the brace on his arm. “The guy did this to me. I just wanna get even.”

Toomes was silent for a long moment, thinking hard. Everything was a mess now. He was divorced, hadn’t seen Liz in months, and when he asked his lawyer about parole, the bastard had the nerve to laugh.

“...you gonna kill him?” Toomes asked.

Gargan shrugged. “Nah, too much energy. Just wanna watch him shit himself, you know? Humiliate him. Rough him up a bit.”

Toomes tapped his finger. If there wasn’t a death on his hands, he supposed he could deal with the guilt. Gargan was probably talking out of his ass, anyway.

“I’ll give you a location, then you leave me alone. Okay?” Toomes said. Gargan nodded. Toomes leaned in close, whispering.

“Midtown School of Science and Tech.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Some of you keen eyed comic lovers might notice a familiar character from the spider man comics :))))


	8. Ready Aim Fire Away

_“Dr. Stilwell, there is evidence, but all the same it’s too dangerous.” Remi, the assistant head of Project Arachne. Farley Stillwell liked his cautious approach, but it could get in the way of things._

_Like it was right now._

_“The OsCorp spider escaped? It’s found dead, with a mandible broken off, indicating it bit something. Or someone. A few weeks later…” Stillwell clicked ‘play’ on the YouTube video, and the frozen Spider-man on the screen resumed swinging across the New York skyline._

_“That doesn’t mean the spider bit that guy.” Remi protested. Stillwell glared._

_“Do you have any better explanations?!” Stillwell snapped. Remi winced._

_“Now, this lady might be insane, but she’s the most knowledgeable arachnid entomologist in America. If anyone can repeat this accident those psychopaths at OsCorp stumbled upon, it’s her.” Stillwell snarled._

_Remi sighed. “She’s so creepy.”_

_“That’s rude.”_

_Remi jumped, seeing a tall blond woman with big glasses staring at him. A massive spider sat on her head, apparently at ease with its position. The woman smiled._

_Stillwell forced a nod. “Dr. Fishbach.”_

_“I’ve gotten some work done, come with me.” Fishbach nodded, motioning for the two to follow her. She rushed into a dark room that smelled like wet moss, and cricket noises filled the room. Remi shivered. He hated the Bug Room._

_“Come on, sweetie!” Fishbach crooned at a huge scorpion, clinging to a piece of bark. Remi grimaced. This woman was insane._

_“Alright...this is the best specimen I have. Asian Forest Scorpion. Kelly.” She held out the scorpion proudly._

_Stillwell made a face. “I thought you said these ones aren’t lethal.”_

_“Only because of their size. The neurotoxin isn’t potent because they’re so big, and they don’t need protection like the smaller ones do. Extracting the toxin and duplicating it will easily make it lethal, and the test subject should in theory be able to control the amount of toxin injected. Kelly here is also one of the strongest, her exoskeleton doesn’t crack easily, making her already way less vulnerable than any spider.” Fishbach grinned, letting the scorpion scuttle over her hand._

_“What are the effects of the neurotoxin?” Stillwell asked._

_“Assuming Kelly didn’t sting to kill, usually there’s muscle spasms and paralysis, numbness and swelling at the sting sight, difficulty breathing, nausea, and some other various symptoms.” Fishbach said._

_“Lovely.” Remi muttered._

_“How soon can you synthesized the DNA?” Stillwell asked._

_Fishbach grinned._

_“I already did. It’s a success. I’m ready whenever you are.”_


	9. Fire!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Did yall see the new far from home trailer????? thats some good stuff right there

Peter really, really hated his car.

Just before he got dusted, he had been set to get his driver’s license soon. And when he got back, he got his immediately.

But it wasn’t the celebration he had envisioned.

Pepper had insisted on giving Peter one of the many, many cars Tony had owned. Peter of course refused, feeling almost like it was taboo, but when he realized Pepper was tearing up as she insisted, he caved, taking the most nondescript car he could find, though that was a challenge. 

He ended up with a Chevy. 

He tried to drive it as little as possible, because whenever he did, he saw Tony in the rearview mirror, smiling in the back. 

Although every second Saturday he couldn’t avoid that.

“Well well well, back to rip open a few more wounds?” Tony asked from the backseat. Peter clenched his teeth, trying to focus on the road. Driving in the city was one thing, but forest roads made him nervous.

“Stop it. She asked me to come.” Peter muttered. Pepper had made it a sort of tradition to come to their cabin by the lake it upstate New York, a more rural area that Peter was surprised Tony liked. It was hard to picture the man becoming one with nature and all that, but stranger things had happened.

“Mhm. But you don’t have too.” Tony said.

Peter pulled into the gravel driveway, taking a deep breath. These visits always drained him. 

He saw a streak of brown hair run across the lawn, and he forced a smile.

“Hi Peter.” Morgan said, skidding to a stop next to Peter as if she just happened to see him in a store as opposed to sprinting to him.

“Hi Morgan. How’ve you been?” Peter locked the car-a habit, he was from Queens-stepping out and grabbing the bag in the seat next to him. 

“Mommy and I went to the zoo.” Morgan informed him seriously. Peter chuckled. Morgan was funny, she acted with an aloof air. Not snotty, more so like she was a celebrity who would smile at fans and wave. It was easy to forget she was only five, she acted twice her age.

She was definitely Tony’s daughter.

“You did? How was it?” Peter asked.

“It was cool. Mommy got stung by a wasp though. I stepped on it for her. Did you bring me a present?” She stood on her tiptoes, trying to see in the bag. 

“Am I supposed to bring you something every time?” Peter laughed, handing her the bag. It was for her.

She grinned, reaching in and pulling out a stuffed animal, a dinosaur. Morgan loved dinosaurs, and had watched Jurassic Park more times than Peter could count.

“Did Peter bring you a toy? What do you say?” Pepper emerged from the house, waving at Peter.

“Thank you.” Morgan said, hugging the triceratops, rushing back to her mother.

“She said you got stung by a wasp the other day. Are you alright?” Peter asked.

Pepper chuckled. “I’m okay. We got ice cream after so we ended the day on a good note.”

“Dairy Queen.” Morgan specified.

“Dairy Queen is pretty great. I need to go there. It’s been a while.” Peter agreed.

“Wanna see my lair?” Morgan asked. “I made it bigger. Mommy helped a little.”

Peter nodded immediately, smiling. It was always best to let Morgan be the guide for the day, and never talk down to her. She hated being talked to like she was little, and Peter realized it was best to talk to her like a little adult.

Morgan ran off, motioning for Peter to follow. He waved again at Pepper before following Morgan to a group of trees in the backyard, where a thin wire held up several blankets. Morgan crawled in, and Peter followed, careful not to knock anything over.

“Now I have a table.” Morgan pointed to a tiny table in the corner of the blanket fort, covered in papers and pencils. 

“Is that where you come up with all your ideas?” Peter asked, sitting down cross legged. Morgan nodded, shoving a paper to Peter. He glanced at it, and swallowed.

It was an Iron Man suit.

“This is mine. I’m gonna be a superhero like Daddy.” She said, pleased.

Morgan knew her dad was gone, of course. But it was weird how she processed it. Peter wasn’t sure if she didn’t fully understand death or maybe thought he was coming back, but she seemed in much better shape than Peter. That being said, everyone seemed to be in better shape than Peter.

“Did you tell her it’s your fault?” Peter’s head jerked up at the comment, seeing Tony kneeling in the fort as well, inches from Morgan. Peter made a choking sound, scrambling back. 

Morgan looked confused. “Is it bad?”

“N-no! No no, sorry, I just...I just got something stuck in my throat.” He swallowed hard, handing the paper back to her.

She looked relieved. “I’m gonna be a superhero like Daddy.” She repeated. “I’ll save the world. You can help too, I guess.” She offered graciously.

And all the while, Tony stared at Peter as she talked.


	10. Ready Aim Fire, Ready Aim Fire Away

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oops I dropped my love for Nebula

_“Yeah, okay, why do you want to go back to that shit planet?” Rocket asked, vaguely irritated._

_“It is far preferable to the current standards.” Nebula said, standing in the corner. She had not been on the Guardians ship for very long. For the past few weeks, she had been traveling with Gamora, destroying the last of Thanos’ empire. Gamora was a bit caught up on her home planet, however, and Nebula had no interest in sentimental memories of home, though she didn’t want to force her sister to leave._

_Thus she had made the poor choice to hitch a ride with the Guardians._

_“I think we’re pretty great.” Quill said, looking offended._

_“Your ship is falling apart as we speak. The weapons you have are second rate at best. And there is a constant power struggle between you three despite none of you being fit to be leaders.” She pointed at Quill, Thor, and Rocket._

_“Excuse you-”_

_“And you all smell horrendous.”_

_“We do not! Mantis, do we smell?” Drax turned to the insect like woman, who just perked up, not having been paying attention before._

_“Oh, I do not have a sense of smell!” She said cheerfully._

_“I am Groot.”_

_“You don’t get to have an opinion, Groot. You don’t even have a nose!” Quill snapped._

_“Which is your escape pod?” Nebula asked, irritated by the bickering._

_“Wait! Wait wait…” Quill said, suddenly all the pompadour draining from his face. “Is...Gamora okay?”_

_Nebula’s glass eyes seemed to soften. “Yes. She is fine. She is on her home planet, searching for the remains of her family.”_

_“Does she...want to come back?”_

_Nebula gave him a look. “I would appreciate if you would stop asking. We have not discussed it.”_

_“So you’re going to Earth? Who’s there that you even know?” Thor asked, glancing up and speaking for the first time._

_“No one. Anymore.” Nebula said, grabbing her bag and going to the escape pod._

_“Then…?” Quill said, motioning for her to finish._

_“I know of someone. And I owe another a favor.”_

_“A favor?” Drax asked. “A kill something favor?”_

_“A desperate father’s plea on his last breaths.” Nebula said in a quiet, gravelly voice._

_And before they could ask more questions, she was off, hurtling towards Earth._


	11. Off in the Distance

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> yall heathens just wanna see peter suffer dont you
> 
> anyway go follow my twitter the link is in the description of my profile

“Pepper is too nice for her own good, you know.” Tony said, sitting in the corner of the guest room.

Somehow, Pepper had wrangled Peter into spending the night at their house. Already Peter regretted it. 

He had had about two panic attacks, curled up in a fancy guest bed, muffling his gasps with pillows, turning on water to cover his crying. 

It never seemed loud enough to him.

“Just let me sleep.” Peter muttered, rolling over. 

“Why, are you done feeling guilty? I dunno why you keep telling me to go. You and I both know I’m not going anywhere. Hey, that kinda rhymed.” Tony grinned, sitting at the edge of the bed.

“I’m tired.” Peter snapped.

“And I’m tired of you pretending everything is normal. It’s not. I’m dead. Honestly, it’s pretty gutsy of you to show your face around here. Pepper might not know the truth, but Morgan’ll figure it out. And then what will you do?” Tony asked.

“Stop it!” Peter snapped. God, it hurt so much. Morgan had a family. She didn’t know of the loss her family had, she was fine with their new world and nothing needed to change. 

And then Peter wrecked it for her.

“Why should I stop? I’m only telling the truth-” At that, Peter jumped up, unwilling to listen anymore. He tiptoed downstairs, thankful the stairs didn’t creak. He would just swing through the trees for a bit, tire himself out-

“Peter?”

Peter jumped, seeing Pepper at the kitchen island. She was holding a mug of something. Coffee? No, that wouldn’t make sense during the night…

“O-oh, sorry Ms. Potts-I mean Mrs. Stark, I mean-” Peter stuttered, becoming more horrified with each iteration of her name.

Pepper only smiled. “Pepper is fine.” 

Peter nodded, making a mental note never to called her Mrs. Stark. Avoid saying her name altogether. Yeah, that would work. 

“What are you doing up? Can’t sleep either?” She asked. Peter slowly nodded, seeing no point in lying.

“Do you like tea?” She asked.

“What?” Peter paused. “Oh, no no no, you don’t have to make me anything, I’m fine-”

“Chamomile, green, or Earl Grey?” Pepper asked. 

“I-I...chamomile I guess but-”

“It’s no trouble. Honestly.” She assured him. Peter still felt heavy guilt.

It was quiet for a while, a pleasant smell filling the air as the tea began to finish up. Peter was finally starting to relax. Maybe this wouldn’t be so bad-

“I...I wanted to talk to you.” Pepper said.

_Don’t say it don’t say it don’t say it-_

“About Tony.”

_She said it._

“I...I know it hurts.” She said, voice breaking. Peter could only watch in horror. “I know. But...I wanted to thank you.”

_Oh God, someone kill me. I can’t do this._

“He...he loved you so much, Peter. He really did. When he came back after it...it happened, you were his only regret. He mourned like the rest of the world, yes, but you...you were the only death that really hurt him.”

_Wow, thanks. I feel so much better._

He knew it was unfair to Pepper, she didn’t realize. But Peter was really starting to wish he hadn’t met up with her. Worse still, Tony was in the corner, watching the interaction.

“You...you gave him confidence. I...he was different. Something about you...you chased away his nightmares, I suppose. He was happier, he couldn’t stop talking how smart you were, or what you did now, or how he was going to be totally grey-headed within a year because of you.” She gave a pained chuckle, and Peter truly wanted to die. 

“You were the reason he changed his mind on kids.”

_Just when I thought it couldn’t get any worse._

“I...I just wanted to thank you. You...you helped him so much, motivated him so much in ways I don’t even understand, and even now I know he’s watching, cheering you on-”

“I have to go.” Peter blurted out, standing up.

Pepper looked surprised. “I...what?”

“I-I have to go. I have a test I need to study for and May needed my help with...cleaning this weekend. I have to go.” Peter said, already rushing upstairs to gather his things. He packed in record time, racing downstairs to a confused Pepper. His tea was done.

“Peter-”

“Thanks, Ms…” He paused. “Thanks for having me.” 

“Peter-”

But he was running out. He couldn't stay. He wouldn’t stay. If he did, he might explode, or worse, begin to cry and be unable to stop until he spilled everything; his grades, his fight with May, the ghost…

He couldn’t risk that.

Peter blinked, and he was suddenly on the road, hands gripping the steering wheel like it was the end of the world. And really, it was. 

“That went well.” Tony said from the backseat.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hey we made it through the first verse!!!! thanks for your support, kudos make me smile, comments make me squeal. love yall


	12. Bubbling Up and Festering

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> me, crawling from the depths of my knowledge of ecology: spiders have crappy eyesight if anything peter would need stronger glasses-

School still felt foreign. 

There had been a two week break in between the time when everyone came back when everything had shut down. People were too busy with finding their family and friends to think about trivial things like school and jobs. 

Peter spent that time in a haze, trying to wrap his mind around the fact that it had been five years. May was older, his peers were in college or beginning their new lives. Selfishly, he was thankful Ned, MJ and a few of his acquaintances had been killed as well, and they came back, the same age with no new memories he would have to adjust to.

He was storming out of class, exhausted. His teacher had kept him after for an hour after the lunch bell rang, trying to teach him a simple formula. Peter had given up long ago, and the teacher was soon to follow, dismissing him to go to his next class. Peter was going home instead.

“HEADS UP!” Someone yelped, and Peter’s spidey sense exploded, and he dodged as something crashed to the ground next to him. A wooden rifle.

Oh. The color guard.

Even after he quit band, he feared them slightly, like every smart person in school did. They performed in joint with the marching band, dancing with six foot tall flags, slightly dulled sabres, and wooden rifles. Peter had personally seen one of the girls on the team gash her arm bad enough to need stitches in the middle of a show, but she didn’t stop, even as she performed with tears in her eyes from the pain. What was her name again…?

“God, Steph, watch your aim!” Someone snapped, making Peter’s head jerk up. The tallest girl, the captain, with short, vaguely curly brown hair and bespectled hazel eyes to match, glared at her peer, who had darker skin and thick curly hair.

“Jesus Christ, I didn’t hit him!” The other one, Steph, said, snatching up their rifle. 

“I-it’s okay. I’m alive.” Peter said. The third girl at the end, who looked like the captain except her face was long and not as smiley, and she lacked glasses narrowed her eyes slightly. 

“Aren’t you the guy who quit? You got dusted too, right?” She asked. Peter’s face turned red, and he nodded.

“So what, Emma? At least he had an actual reason for quitting. I’d quit for a Stark internship.” The captain said. Emma turned slightly red, shrugging, not noticing Peter’s flinch at the word ‘Stark”.

“Why are you guys here?” Peter asked. The captain-Riley, that was her name-sighed, spinning a sabre around her arm. 

“We have to catch up. The second our coach finds out about everyone coming back, she texts us that practice isn’t cancelled, and we need to catch up.” Riley explained. Peter laughed. The color guard coach was infamously insane.

“Almost everyone else survived except for us three.” Emma said, glancing back at Peter. “Us three were the only experienced people who died, and the second we come back it’s back on the grind.”

“Damned Avengers, making life difficult again.” Steph mumbled.

Peter knew they meant it as a joke, but…

“Steph, focus. You too, Emma. Your sabre work is crap.” Riley glanced back at Peter, holding up her right wrist, showing off a bulky brace. “Can you believe this shit? I die for five years, I come back, and my wrist is still messed up.”

Peter started to smile, then froze. His spidey sense was suddenly screaming, panicked and warning him of danger, danger, danger, danger-

“GET DOWN!” He yelled, lunging at Steph, pushing them out of the way as the ceiling suddenly cracked, sending a metal beam down in the exact spot where Steph had been moments before. The fire alarmed blared, grating like fingers on a chalkboard to Peter’s ears, and the guard’s screams didn’t help.

“Oh my God!” He heard Emma yell. Steph was coughing, wriggling out of Peter’s grip. 

“Thanks.” They said breathlessly. 

“Peter! Steph!” He saw Riley and Emma through the dust, reaching out to pull them from the rubble. Before Peter’s adventure in space, just the thought of being under a collapsed building would have terrified him. Now he knew there were far worse things. 

“Are you okay?!” Riley asked.

“Yeah, get out of here!” Peter said, carefully pushing them away. 

“What about you?” Emma demanded. 

“I...gotta grab something! Go, I’ll be right there!” They must have been to shocked to argue this weak excuse, as they nodded and ran.

The school was in chaos, kids screaming in panic and teachers yelling, trying to create some sort of order to get everyone out. Peter ducked behind a corner, snapping his Spider-man suit on. What happened?!

“Oh, Spider-man!” An angry, singsong voice called out. Peter froze, watching a man-or what was once a man-climb over the rubble, four pairs of metal legs piercing the concrete as if it were paper. The man smiled when he caught sight of the now-suited-up Peter, and he waved sarcastically, arms covered in a sort of metal armor, or maybe a brace.

Worst of all, a long, scorpion tail protruded from the back of his costume, glinting like evil in the sun.

“Ah, Spider-man.” The man said, grinning madly. “I’ve been through hell to find you.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sis did it. i am now a self insert.
> 
> dont worry this is the last you'll see of ocs in this book. this is not a self insert. 
> 
> but 10 points to the person who guesses which one is me and which ones are just my stupid friends


	13. Hey Mr. Motion

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> bitch is out of school!!!!!

_Nebula hated her heart._

_Out of everything her father (evil, manipulative, ugly madman killer) destroyed, replaced, tampered with, he never touched her heart once. And somehow, he never touched her heart. Not once._

_Out of everything that made her stronger, this was her downfall._

_Logically, she knew her emotions came from the brain firing neurons down through the body, and that made emotions._

_But then why did her heart ache?_

_She stared at the wall of the ship, eyes fixed on a body she never saw but still haunted her. Gamora’s body, splayed and lifeless. Bloodied and empty. Gone forever. The one person she had begun to trust, who made her believe maybe there was an end to the pain, a way out…_

_Snatched away. And the rest of them falling apart into dust._

_She heard someone rustle beside her. The man who hadn’t fallen to pieces like Drax, Mantis, Quill and the small one in the shiny red suit. He was sick. He was stabbed by her father (that bastard, murdering liar, insane sister killer) and his wound was infected._

_At least he didn’t bother her._

_“Do you sleep?” He asked suddenly. Take that last thought back. He did bother her._

_“Not very much. I do not need too.” Nebula said. She stood up, walking to the open ship engine, tinkering with it._

_“...so Gamora? You knew her?” He asked. What was his name? Stank? No, Stark._

_“She was my sister.” Nebula blinked at the sudden wetness in her mechanical eyes. It stung. So did her heart._

_“...I’m sorry.” Stark said. He was quiet. “Peter...he was important to me too.” He paused, then spoke again. “This is going to sound awful but...I hope his aunt died too. She doesn’t deserve to lose him. They’ll...they’ll be happy together. His parents and uncle will be with him…” His head dropped. “...and I don’t think I could face her to tell her I watched her last bit of family die.” He whispered._

_“The boy was important to you.” Nebula said. It wasn’t a question. Stark nodded._

_“...does it hurt?” Nebula asked, surprising herself with the smallness of her voice. Stark nodded, somehow understanding she didn’t mean his wound._

_“Hurts like hell. You?”_

_She seized up, unsure how to answer._

_Stark tilted his head. “What’s wrong?”_

_“Stop.” Nebula said._

_Stark went quiet. “...it’s not wrong to mourn. It hurts, but...that means you’re human. Or...whatever you are.”_

_Nebula still ignored him._

_“We have to get them back. We WILL get them back.” Stark glanced at her. “Promise me something.”_

_“I don’t make promises-”_

_“Please.” Stark said, absolute pleading in his voice. Nebula finally turned to him._

_“...what is it?”_

_“If I...you know.” He made a slicing motion across his neck. “Just...make sure the kid is okay. They’ll come back. They have too. I just don’t know if I’ll be there for it...just make sure he’s okay. Please.”_

_Nebula was dead silent, and then nodded, despite her every instinct telling her no._

_Stark nodded. “...thank you.”_


End file.
